Jokes you think are hilarious that really aren't

Happy Humpday! In honor of puns and sex, here are some stupid things people say to make us laugh that, in reality, make us cringe. These are jokes/pick up lines (?) heard almost daily by some of our customers.

• "All right/Oh yeah/OK/That's what I'm talking about, are you going to do that here or in the bathroom?" -As a policy we have to test any toys with our tester batteries to make sure it is working properly and to show our customer how to turn it on; that is their reaction.
• "I want the biggest butt plug you have" "Where is your largest dildo" "I'm looking for a the biggest, blackest vibrator you have" -Now, I have no problem helping someone find the biggest, veiniest, darkest dildo we have in stock, if that is really what they are looking for. However, we tend to only get this request from some smart-ass who comes in with his entourage of guy friends or some shy girl friend. We get it, you are the reigning king of Beer Pong and can't take a piss unless you have five of your friends there to high five you for a job well done.
• "Your boyfriend must love that you work here" -Subtle boys, well done. We always have boyfriends...even when we don't have boyfriends, we have boyfriends. Maybe try something more original?
• "Are you for sale?" -I actually had some 17 year old ask this as he was standing outside of the store. You'd be surprised how many times we get asked this.

If you want to make a sex shop worker laugh, you're going to have to try harder than that!